Johnny Moronic Capturing - September 2008

27/09/2008

Update for 27 September...

It's that time of the year again when I start to slow down with the update because I simply can't be bothered (it gets worse in October...). Of course things picks up in November/December. But, I've gotten around to doing something, although I'm already a couple of weeks behind on Johnny Moronic Television, we need some barren weeks, but the new show, The Strip, is basically Baywatch Nights: Gold Coast, with mandatory bikini action and similar quality storylines.

Everything is brand new off the fryer, no older stuff. First up is Three and Out, an odd and very British comedy about a train driver who has killed (accidently) two people and is promised 10 years salary if he kills a third within a month, so he finds a suicidal man to go through with the deal. But of course, he befriends him. The British do these films well, but this film is nothing special, just an OK time waster. Flashbacks of a Fool stars Daniel Craig as a Hollywood star on the decline who remembers back to his youth when his best friend Boots dies. This is a solid and very watchable drama with a pretty decent British cast, even if it has problems with time periods. Plus, I like Jodhi May and this is probably the best she has ever looked. Damn...

Normal is a ensemble drama about a group of people who were involved in an incident and how they are coping with it. I've got to admit, I'm getting a little tired of these ernest films that like to bash us over the head about how things are like Babel and Crash, and Normal gets a bit too much very quickly. Some nice nudity though. Then there's Itty Bitty Titty Committee which is about a lesbian (Melonie Diaz) who is not handling a break up well who meets a girl (Nicole Vicius) vandalising her workplace, a plastic surgery clinic. The vandal invites the lesbian to a meeting of her group, a low rung feminist revolutionary group and she takes a shine to the 'revolutionary'. Basically, this film is a lesbian romantic comedy with a feminist political bent, and in case you haven't realised this, romantic comedies are pretty much all the same, straight or gay, although there's a nice lesbian sex scene in this film, which gives it a few extra points :)

To finish up, a couple of Australian films, both starring Toni Collette (who seems to be copping a barrage of insults for some strange reason, at least she's working in the Australian film industry unlike a number of others who will remain nameless, but you know who they are...). First up is Hey Hey It's Esther Blueberger, which has copped the brunt of the abuse this year (there's always one). And well, this film is a strange one, about a 14 year old Jewish girl who meets an older girl and becomes friends, then joins her at her public school without telling her parents. Oh, this one isn't for the kiddies or the tweens and hell, I don't know who it is for. The film has many strange moments (including references to a 14 year old performing oral sex!). This film is one part Ferris Bueller, one part Kids, which is a strange mix for a light comedy. I really don't know how to recommend this one. The Black Balloon is a very good coming of age film about a teenage boy dealing with his autistic brother and a new school. Model Gemma Ward appears as the love interest and well she sure is pretty to look at. Worth a look if you can find it.

And that just about sums up Australian films this year 'if you can find them'. Saw The Tender Hook on the weekend (me and a couple of other people...) which flopped miserably at the box office, even with two big Australian actors (Hugo Weaving and Rose Byrne). Personally I thought the film was a mess which just adds to the problems. For the rest of Australian films I recommend Cactus (a solid genre two hander) and The Square (another solid genre effort), but there are no standouts this year. And then you've got to find them...

Gemma Arterton in Three and Out

Raw HD caps of Gemma in Three and Out are available here.

April 2013 collages

September 2008 collages

125052kb 1min 52sec 1920x816 (breasts, hint of bum, bra, 'nude' under covers, sex scene, lengthy)

Jodhi May in Flashbacks of a Fool

October 2012 collages

September 2008 collages

95474kb 1min 20sec 1920x784 (plenty of cleavage in nice dress, hint of bra)

130008kb 1min 46sec 1920x784 (plenty of cleavage in nice dress, lengthy)

110572kb 1min 29sec 1920x784 (breasts almost full frontal, bum, bra and panties, stockings, sex scene)

28746kb 23sec 1920x784 (breasts, sex scene)

Julie Ordon and Gina Athens in Flashbacks of a Fool

141316kb 1min 55sec 1920x784 (breasts, bum, possibly more, threesome, mostly out of focus, lengthy)

Camille Sullivan in Normal

Raw HD caps of Camille from Normal are available here.

February 2022 collages

September 2008 collages

309548kb 5min 30sec 1920x1088 (breasts. 'nude' under covers, in towel, sex scene, extremely lengthy)

Lauren Lee Smith in Normal

Raw HD caps of Lauren from Normal are available here.

September 2008 collages

39926kb 44sec 1920x1088 (breasts/side-boob, bum, sex scene)

Melonie Diaz (with Nicole Vicius) in Itty Bitty Titty Committee

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58410kb 3min 800x448 (contains nudity)

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Nicole Vicius (with Melonie Diaz) in Itty Bitty Titty Committee

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Daniela Sea and Carly Pope in Itty Bitty Titty Committee

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Toni Collette in Hey Hey It's Esther Blueberger

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Gemma Ward in The Black Balloon

Raw HD caps of Gemma from The Black Balloon are available here.

185433kb 2min 15sec 1920x1080 (one piece bathing suit, lengthy)

5496kb 5sec 1920x1080 (in shower)

426446kb 4min 47sec 1920x1080 (wet bra and panties, extremely lengthy)

Tags: Gemma Arterton, Jodhi May, Julie Ordon, Gina Athens, Camille Sullivan, Lauren Lee Smith, Melonie Diaz, Nicole Vicius, Daniela Sea, Carly Pope, Toni Collette, Gemma Ward

11/09/2008

Update for 11 September...

Haven't really being in the mood to do too many collages in the past few weeks, but I finally got around to this update.

It doesn't help that all three films featured here today are pretty poor. Never Back Down is a Karate Kid rip-off that is pretty full of itself, so much so, that's it's just awful, not enjoyably awful... but I like Amber Heard a lot. Deception doesn't know what it wants to be, an erotic thriller, corporate thriller or just a good old fashioned sexy thriller, but it fails at all three. By the fact that there are a number of well known actors in the film, I suggest that at some stage there was a good film being made, so what the hell went wrong..? Oh, and the alternative ending is better than the actual ending (which stretches all manner of logic).

But, I've saved the worst for last, and that's Pretty Little Devils. I lost interest in this film after 30 minutes. I think the film wants to be a satire, but fucked if I know how it was going to achieve that when there's no indication that the film is having a go at something, and as a straight up comedy... a laugh would help. And Haylie Duff... I don't like saying awful things about people, so I'll leave it to you're imagination as to what I'm thinking... *spits*

Amber Heard in Never Back Down

Raw HD caps of Amber from Never Back Down are available here.

August 2014 collages